hahaha i think i love to sing. Actually no la.. i really love to sing. Unfortunately, I was not blessed with a good singing voice from young. I remembered that I have been singing all my life. i can even remember like when i bathing crapping in toilet at around 4 years old, I always compose my own songs and sing it. It is super random and go by any tune I like. hahaha

You know, when you are young and you sing, people just think you are cute and don't really judge whether you sing well. But when I grow older, my brother always throw rubbish comments at me and say my singing sucks. Luckily, my sister always say i sing well which gave me alot of confidence. hahaa

So I went sec 1 and know wanqing, and she intoduced me to S.H.E while I introduced to her 5566 (seems such a gazillion years away). I don't dare to sing to her or my friends at all, because I know I cannot sing well. (Due to my thicked-skinness, i somehow managed to tell myself that I actually sing well and people just don't know) I always cant reach the note properly. CMI. So most of the time I sing to myself. I lip synched on the way to school and back, before I sleep. There is even this long period of time when whenever I reach home i will download all the MTVs and start singing along with them. I am the kid who wanna be a superstar you can say that. Cos i love the glam and the attention.

But I also love to sing.

So, I was sad that every single time people hear me sing, they will tell me it is not nice. I can still remember back in AJC I sign up for this one-day singing learning lesson.

Got sabotage up to sing by Rueben and Fiona. Was super super embarassed singing "Lao shu ai da mi". I think i zhao sia like alot of times? haha...right in front of me this guy was like shaking his head in an irritated manner. I think Rueben even recorded the audio la i wan kill him already. So anyway, I was quite sad by that whole episode.

I remember praying a small prayer to God to bless me with good singing voice cos i really love to sing alot.

And like just this year, my singing improved alot. I have to say it is wanqing's credit, cos she was the one who taught me properly how to sing. And also, due to a morale boosting KTV session in Penang with my cousins, where they let me sing all the songs I want and say I sing well.

So I started beginning to sing fine!=) People are telling me that I can sing well now, which makes me a bit happy. Zhirui also say my singing improved leh. haha. So I am like so so so happy la...

wahahaha...to be able to sing what I want to sing is really a very happy thing.To want to sing and cannot reach the key is very very sad. I took 15+ to overcome that lo. Recently I asked my mum why she never sings one, she doesn't like singing? She say she like but "chang bu chu lai". Then I realised my brothers are also like that, like to sing but due to various reasons, never really sing. Well, my sister do sing abit, just a bit. lols, she always complain about not being able to remember lyrics.

haha, so in conclusion, I am the one who starts singing once I reached home. And my brother would be calling me to shut up. So mean.

haha, so yeah i m thinking of learning piano, dancing and maybe singing also.

ok i got to go listen to "1 litres of tears-konayuki". It is damn nice. so buh bue!



okay i am going to leave work now! 3 days left to end of IBN. Just a tinge of sadness I have. Which is cruelly destroyed eveery morning I force myself to wake up to come to this place. But I don't really regret coming to work at IBN because well at least I have a comp, I get paid not very decent, but okay.

haha did not went nght cycling in the end. =(

alright gonna leave to meet zhirui already! =) So nice of him to treat me dinner when I am broke!

tata.................



Well, it seems like everybody have watched or at least heard of this show once. I keep dozing off at the office because of watching this show for 2 consecutive nights.

The disease that plagued the girl in the show is called spinocerebellar degeneration disease. This is a disease where one cerebellum which controls a body's balance starts to shrink. So one will slowly lose their bodily functions one by one as the disease progress. Walking would slowly cease to be impossible, speech, eating, and eventually you will never wake up. But you can hear and think like anyone else, just that your body is no longer under your control anymore. Basically, it is a slow and cruel death. There is currently no cure.

So why am I telling you this?

Because I want to make a comparison with another disease. Premature Alzheimer. Yes that is exactly what it sounds like. Early onset of dementia. You will slowly lose your memory starting from the most recent to the oldest memory. Very soon, you will forget everything, the road home, your loved ones and even yourself. You wake up not knowing where and why you are there. Also, you will not be able to control your bladder and would urinate randomly. Only medicine available to slow down the disease, no cure as well.

These are two of the cruelest disease I know of.

I don’t know, I am just wondering...no offence to anyone...which is a worse disease to have? To lose your memory or to lose your body?

'Without your memory, is there a reason to live anymore? I watch this show once where this girl says to her husband eg. "James I love you", while James is the ex boyfriend name. It confuses the husband as to who she really love. To lose your body but to keep your memory? Is that slightly better?

What do you think?



1 more week and 2 days left to the end of IBN. I can’t wait. Last night I watch 1 litre of tears and it makes me like…..it is this kind of show that leave you treasuring whatever you have and stop complaining. I would highly recommend this show to everyone, including cold blooded people who don’t ever cry. You will when you watch this show. =)

I am in love with this girl.

Erika Sawajiri












What do you think?=)



The purpose of the LPP is to prepare students for exchange in French, Korean, and/or German medium universities in their 2nd & 3rd year. Write in 300 words why you would like to participate in the student exchange programme in these countries.


As Ludwig Wittgenstein had said, “The limits of my language mean the limits of my world”. If this statement is true, my “world” is truly narrowed with the limited languages I know. Being a keen explorer since young, the opportunity to pick up French in NUS and to actively practice it in the SEP could not be more enticing. Other than satisfying my personal interests, picking up a foreign language also opens up new job opportunities for me in this cosmopolitan society. Having been in an Asian country all 19 years of my life, I feel it is really time to explore more of this large world and widen my perspective. And what easier way is there than to learn a foreign language?

Language is a skill of a lifetime, it could bring you to places you would find difficult to thrive in without a common tongue as the natives. Choosing to go to an English-speaking country for SEP would definitely be more convenient as I could easily communicate with and learn from the students there; however, learning in a non-English speaking school, even though challenging, would provide me with a whole new dimension and insight towards learning. This would be an added benefit for me apart from mere content.

I have always been curious about the European cultures, which is starkly different from the way of life in Singapore. France was ranked first among 192 countries in the “2008 Quality of Life Index” released by “International Living”. Also, in the 2008 scoreboard of the best universities worldwide, the British Times Higher Education – QS introduced a new type of index: the capacity of a country to offer a high quality and internationally recognized system of university education. France is ranked in 7th place behind the United States, United Kingdom, etc. Indeed, France is the true embodiment of arts and has attracted me to engage myself in their culture.





He who does not know foreign languages does not know anything about his own. ~Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, Kunst and Alterthum

A different language is a different vision of life. ~Federico Fellini

Learn a new language and get a new soul. ~Czech Proverb

The limits of my language mean the limits of my world.
Ludwig Wittgenstein

French is the language that turns dirt into romance.
Stephen King

Language is not only the vehicle of thought; it is a great and efficient instrument in thinking.
Humphrey Davy

If we spoke a different language, we would perceive a somewhat different world. Ludwig Wittgenstein

Language shapes the way we think, and determines what we can think about.
Benjamin Whorf

One does not inhabit a country; one inhabits a language. That is our country, our fatherland --and no other. E.M. Cioran



This is what i wrote for the essay to get into the language preparation programme at NUS. Do you think I have a good chance of getting in?



gosh i think the MRT is seriously crazy. Singapore is getting crazy. Why is that so? This is because of the crowd. Everywhere other than your home ( maybe even your house) is crowded. Once you step out of your home, everywhere you go seems to be squeeze with so many people! it is mad!! MRTs are crowded, shopping centres are crowded, buses are crowded, interchange are crowded. GOSH, where did all these people come from. STOP THE IMPORTING OF PEOPLE! argh

enough of complaining

i think the MRT could be counted as one of the place i spent alot of time in. I think mayb 1/8 of my life is spent in the MRTs. That is pathetic. Ya, anyway i was just wondering about the buying of standard ticket card. I wonder what happens if u buy a ticket and then try to shuff it back into the machine immediately to get back the deposit. Do you think they will return you the money inside the card that were not used? or will they just give you back your 1 dollar deposit. Or will it reject your card? haha, anyone who is willing to give it a try could tell me the answer in the tagboard. haha

another thing i wanna rant about is me.

i dunno since when, i start to stop actively conversing with people. It is not that i dunno how to, or i m shy (maybe just a little), i think the real reason i stop trying to get to know people is i got lazy. Seriously. I remember I used to strike conversations with acquaintance alot last time, or maybe even aunties and uncles selling me stuff. And then with time, i shy away, i avoid situations where i need to strike conversations, it felt unneccessary.

Recently, meeting someone in my workplace woke me up.

I could do it too, i used to do it alot. it is not difficult. It is a skill i always know, but just forgotten i had it.

i am going to try harder now. I m sure i can.=)

P.S: i m worried about sat's night cycling trip. I am paranoid about bikes. I have too many bike-related accidents already! argh...but i really wanna go! what should i do?



haha zr ask me to blog so i decided to randomly blog on my new laptop. the keyboard is so cool that i cannot stop typing lol.

so why is a gravity a bitch? cos it causes wear and tear

haha no la

cos it makes s sag

ppl always say gravity is the cause of sagging

i think it is q sad

so i m lying flat on the bed with the laptop on my tummy so i wun sag...isn that really creative?=)

it is 2.30 am already and i haven slp! i supposed to meet zr for breakfast at 7.30!!! how to do tt!



As you can see, I am very happy today!=)=)=)=)

Why is that so?

This is because zhirui say his friends say I am quite pretty/very pretty.

Yea!! I am flying on cloud nine now...wahahah...

But zhirui have to continue by saying something...

zhirui:eh, alot of my frens say you quite pretty one leh...i DUNNO WHY la...

i have to emphasize on the dunno why...because cos of that two words...zhirui ears have to suffer for another half an hour (joking)

haha, what duunno why!GRRR

cos pretty la

heee

dun judge me

stroke my ego peeps.=)=)



Yesterday, my family and I went to eat dinner after my work ended.This is probably a durian season or something, because it seems like my parents kept buying durians home. Which is good, because I love durians.

Durians have always been a family affair for me since young, we would squat down in the middle of the living room, with my mum skillfully prying open durians where the other 4/5 of us (my younger brother did not seem to develop the same love as the rest of us) have our hands ready to grab the biggest/nicest-looking durian. Choosing the right durian require skills I do not have, and the bargaining involved is one I deeply regretted not being inherited or learned.

So, in short, I only know how to eat. And maybe pry open durians. =)

It was the same for wanqing, she has only ever eaten durians with her family also. I think this is a trend because eating durians is so messy that it is not a sight you want to e catch with friends. Maybe not. Lols.

So there was this once wanqing and I walked past this durian selling store in woodlands, fuchun area. (We were studying for our O levels) Having the urge to eat durians, we approached and decided to buy one of the packets. It looks nice enough.

We paid and headed to the fuchun community centre top level( FCC is where we mug our life away for O’s) to eat our delicious durian. The first bite was not very nice, but still okay okay. If I am not wrong there are 6 durians in the packet. So we ate one with a little satisfaction, ate the second one just to eat. Then when it was left with the two, it became so disgusting that we both don’t want to eat them anymore! So we both began to whine that each other should eat the remaining two.

If I am not wrong, we throw both away. LOLS. We swear never to buy durians on our own again. Since that incident, I kept away fro drains for many months, unable to forget that sickening taste in my mouth.



I am going to die. Going to. Nearly there. Dead.

You know why? Because smarterchild keep giving me stupid answers to all the questions I asked. Curious? Go try. I talk to him for 1 hour before I realized how dumb it was.

Hee.

Life is too serious with so much expectation. I once read somewhere:

“When one is young, we have big plans. We feel invincible. Everything is possible. As one move on in life, we make decisions and fulfill our plans. We don’t know whether the decisions we made are really right.

At the end of the day, as we lay on our deathbed, we hope, we truly hope, our plans did matter, what we did have indeed make a difference. But we never know. At the end of the day, what we did are just plans.”

This is not the real word-by-word quote. Anyone know the real one please tell me. This was written fro my memory. Really, did it matter?

Lols. Do you feel like when you have a goal in life, eg. O levels, A levels. Your day seems tiring and stressful, but you have something to think about everyday, something to strive for. You think “after this, I am soo going to enjoy yourself!”

Did it really happen? Did you really enjoy so much? I wish I could say yes. But no, I did not. After spending two days not doing anything much at home, I start to rot. Lethargy sets in. Head gets a bit giddy and heavy. Then since you have nothing to do in the first place, you head to bed and sleep some more. When you wake up, it is already night. =(

Actually the headache comes from sleeping too much.

But the opposite sucks too! Waking up so early everyday really really sucks. I want to sleep. Yawns. Yes, it is only 9.30am now! Why am I awake! *slaps myself and fall asleep on the desk.

Okay it is 6pm now, time for me to go home. I just woke up. =)

Hee. Just joking.

My point is, don’t take life too seriously. But take life a bit seriously.

Conclusion: Take your life.

WAHAHA.



Okay, Suba have officially left Singapore=( SUBA SUBA SUBARU!!!

How come you left without giving us a chance to watch you dance!

DANCE SUBARU
_________________

Yesterday we sneak off work a little bit earlier to meet up with Yingru and hopefully Suba to have a last meeting before she leave for Australia for university. Me and jess reached Orchard MRT and started to find yingru. AND yingru was pestered by a modeling agency that wants to recruit her as a model! cool lar haha. She refused politely and off we went to forever 21. I think it is good to go forever 21 only when you are less than 21 years old. Being 21 makes you a little sad too, when you enter the shop, because you know in one more year you don't belong anymore. (not really but ya, you get my point) Being older than 21 makes you feel like you are too old to enter this shop anymore!

So my conclusion is this shop should not be named forever 21. It just makes people sad.

So we move on to cotton on since we are not 21 yet. Hee. *incoherence beginning.

O well, nothing really interesting happen, so lets move on.

We went in search of Mphosis beause there is a 70% store wide offer there. Yingru bought a pair of shoes costing $24.60. And this conversation begins:

Me:eh your mum won't scold meh? If she see you buy so ex

Yingru: She sure will scold one la. Everytime buy anything sure will say one.

Me: Then you tell her you buy for $10 la.

Yingru: ya i think i will tell her that. But last time i tell her $10, she ask me why not $5. Bo bian sure will scold one.

So when she was paying, I was like trying to remove all price tag to aid in her lie. We remove one, and I seem to remember there is one more on the shoe itself. But because of the tediousness of opening the packaging in order to remove the price tag, I gave up and just reminded her that there was one on the shoe. Oya, I think in the end she never remove it. Shall ask her what happen next time. Haha.

Then we have nowhere to go!

We went takashimaya and walked around the food place. Then hungry yingru decide to buy the prata plus sausage thingy(forgot the name). And then I saw this promotion beside it. It wrote: Especially for dad. Jumbo sausage+lemon grass lemon juice for $4.50.

Me:eh buy that la. Say you are a dad.

Shop keeper: gives a fake patronising smile.

Me: eh, say you buying for your dad la... then can already

Yingru:okay. Erm can I have the Esp for dad one. I buying for my dad.

Jess: okay, I also want one. For my dad too.

Me: (initially not intending to eat because ate quite late and is rather full still) I...I...I also want one! Cannot feel left out. Must jump on the BANDWAGON! Haha, so i got one too. For my dad.

So all three of us bought jumbo sausage and grass lemon tea for our dad. As if.

TEEHEE. The uncle beside us (who is really a dad) questioned us:

“you 3 so filial ah, really buying for your dad ah.”

YES.

Then I started asking: why is it called lemon grass lemon.

Jess: cos is add 2 lemons and a blade of grass.

Me: oh so is 2 to one proportion of lemon and grass.

Me: nono, so is 2 lemon 1 grass and Suba dancing inside.

Jess and yingru:-.-

Then we went to sit down and proceed to eat our dad's dinner! =)

haha! Basically, it was a super irrelevant day for me. Trying my hardest to be irrelevant( not that hard, many will argue) the entire day by adding “dance subaru” into everything I say.=)

At this point of time, Suba appeared and started dancing in front of us.

_The End_



HALLO this is JESS! :D
wahaha.



I think the public transport possess a life of its own to humiliate people.

Whenever before I board a bus, I would suffer from a pre-boarding syndrome where my heartbeat start to race, breathing rate increased, and this can only be stop when I managed to find my ez link card. This is partially because I don’t have a wallet (because I lose the too often) and it takes longer for me to find it and because the trauma of not finding it is too scary.

Imagine you board the bus, and you continue searching frantically in the bus for your ez link. The bus uncle would not drive off for two possible reasons, firstly because he wants to ensure that you pay up before he continues the journey, in case you are being funny and just want to take a free ride. Secondly, he may be concern about your safety and don’t want you to fall down as you continue your search. This would lead to the whole bus looking at you searching for your card since the bus is not moving. You would then proceed to be slightly embarrassed and in which case you are lucky, you find your ez link, tap and move on. IF you don’t, you have to spend somemore time finding coins, tap and move on. IF YOU DON’T HAVE COINS, GG already, can find a hole and burrow your head inside already lar! Ultimate embarrassing. You have to go to random passengers and ask for exchange of coins or get down the bus. HAHA, both sucks. But I always do the former.

What happens when you have an ez link card, BUT it has no more value inside! This is the most hated one. You hold your breathe and tap the holy card, hoping to hear a loud beep. Instead, a super EXTREMELY loud BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP sound ring, and you proceed to frantically fumble in your bag for another card, and hopefully it have value. There was once super cool incident, my mum tap like 4 cards and all have no value, I can already feel myself shrinking into the seat already. Because the sound is so loud, it ensures that every passenger on board would be sure to turn their head and stare at you. TILL you pay up. ARGH.

Luckily my second ez link card has value inside today, and I managed to escape nearly unscathed.

I cannot take the trauma. SAVE ME.





I look like a pro sia!



photos seem blur!



I can't believe it is friday tomorrow!Lols I only went work 3 days this week la! And it is friday already. Zhirui is coming out tomorrow=). But Suba is leaving for australia tomorrow=(. How come everyone is slowly leaving me already? Sad, no one loves me ANYMORE! *cue mr lonely song.

Digressing, I am actually rather worried about my cells after not going to work for 2 days! There, I am passionate about research! I am even concerned when I am sick at home (hee) and when I go to the hospital to take deadly steroid injections. LOL

I went back Nan Hua today with jess!

Haha, after the LPP (language preparation programme) talk, we were like "where should we go now?

Want to catch dance subaru?

Nah, no nets=$7.50.

So, we went back Nan Hua. But we forgot it is school holidays la! So lots of canteen stalls were not open so we did't eat what we wanted.=(

Oya, when we were walking towards NH, there is this guy who after placing a "check road level thingy" at the side of the road, started running off!

HAHA, me and jess was like "why is he running? Is that a bomb?! And we started running and laughing crazily off. LOLS

Turns out he was just running to his colleague at another part of the road.

Uni life is starting soon!ARGH...2 days after national day la!

Sian....

P.S: I nearly died today from pain. Literally





I like this picture! I look drunk but I am not!=)me and jessica are all smiles after the alcohol



One more month to the end of IBN. 3 more months to wanqing coming back singapore. 9 more days to zhirui POP. 2 months plus to start of university life~!One more month to holiday with Jess and Yingru to KL? 1 more minute to lunchtime!

Oh no, I just saw zhirui message at 8.21am saying he is free and can call him! I missed the chance!=( Anyway, he didn't managed to get leave to go Bintan, because it was too late, the application over already. =(

Sad.

NO one is online again! Argh


nice candid shot taken from lirong!



Recently, I found MRT to be really uncomfortable! What with STOMP and the recent Phua Chu Kang courtesy campaign. I almost never sit on the train seats anymore in case anyone accuses me of not giving up my seats to other more needy people. I definitely NEVER sit on priority seats. Simply because people sitting on priority seats often gets labeled as being inconsiderate, selfish, pretentious Singaporeans. I really don’t get why when someone sleeps on the train, the general public would say they are acting sleeping so they do not have to give up their precious seats to pregnant ladies, old people, etc. I mean, if you have nothing to do on the train, and with the long hours you spent in schools or work, you would want to use the extra time to catch a wink don’t you? Do you prefer EVERYONE sitting to be awake and staring all around the MRT trains for potential “priority” people to give up their seats to? Then what is the point of sitting if it becomes so stressful? Aren’t other people entitled to the seats sometimes as well? Why made it so stressful for the public to take a seat? It have become even more ridiculous with the putting of Phua Chu Kang posters on the windows on the of the seats pointing exactly at the person below “to give up his seat to more needy people”. Everyone seeing the posters would immediately put the selfish Singaporeans label on the poor guy sitting on that seat if he is not in the category of “needy”.

Although it is my personal choice almost never to sit when the MRT is crowded, since I am view as young and I AM young, there are times where I feel I sorely need a seat and when I do sit, I would be paranoid and feel that everyone is watching me and judging me. I think I am turning seataphobia. Haha.

And what is with the hostility given to people who were asked to give up seats and do when asked to do so? They did give up their seats, so can’t people’s brain function like:

Boy gave up seat=polite and considerate boy=deserve complimenting=give him a smile and say thank you.

Why must it be like:

Boy gave up seat=Only when ask then reluctantly give up seats=selfish boy, never ask then wouldn’t give up seats= give hostile look and want to complain to STOMP or boy’s school about boy’s bad behavior (if he so sway in school uniform)=proceed to give his reproaching and hostile look

WHY WHY WHY

Today trip on the MRT makes me feel like the MRT have become a morality judging ground, where everyone young and fit are the people taking the test, “needy” people being the test paper, and the rest are the judges. WOW, Singaporeans have become the true entitlement of the label as the “country who only knows how to ace tests”. Maybe in a few years time, to get a job, everyone need to pass a “morality test” which takes place on MRT trains where potential employers camp to judge employees.

What a great society.=)